*Will I ever amount to anything more than a petty plagiarist?
Question:
I have a Church, a stallion, some priceless lemon lump shavins in a swaggy little bag. My Library is stacked to the roof with theoretical prose and quantum poetry. I have honorary degrees in Cranial Calcification and Quasi-Nuclear Biothermopolly, and I was also a co-inventor of The Hydroponic Deneurolizer model 888.8 v.1.2 (TM). I own a liquor store in Pudunk (GA), a gnat and jigger netting distributorship in Tuscaloosa (AL), a small 5 acre petting zoo in Fiji, and a salt factory in Big Bone Lick (MT)...(for you wiseguys out there, before you start responding with "clever" answers, I do have a vast strip mall in Beaver Lick, MT). I have numerous concubines that worship me and my Church. I have a tax exempt status with both Vogon and US authorities... Yet my life is empty. Is it because I still haven't found theLard or is it because I keep infringing upon copyrights of others?
*Any help given will be Y!Oinked
Answer:
Hardcore plagiarism would appear to be the next logical step in you career structure. Building a career as a hardcore plagiarist is not simply a matter of printing certificates on your swaggy little printer. It involves years of hard work. A few minutes of which might even have to be your own.
Incidentaly I used to work at your salt factory and I must say I look back fondly on my days as a Big Bone Licker even though it was quite often messy work, it was a handy job at the time.
wtf?
Yes, you, too, can become a piller of society, looked up to by royalty from all four corners of the earth. All you need to do is send "Radar" O'Reilly a check for $29.95, and your shoe size. He will forward to you one pair of elevator shoes, hardly used, in either brown and white or black wing tip. Then, you can join the ranks of the greatest plagerists in the Southern hemisphere, leaving the ranks of the petty behind in your dust. The view from the heights will be dizzying, so hold on!
You made me giggle ... Y!Oinked indeed.
Now your life is complete ... making Princess Cinnamon giggle has been the goal of many a great man.
WTF?!!?!?!?!
the life of a plagiarist, tho often difficult and fraught with dangers real and imagained, is one to be envied. I salute you!
Y!OINK!
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