What does the commandment, "Honor your father and mother" literally mean?
Question:
I am not looking for your personal opinion of the interpretation of the word honor or of the commandment itself. I am looking for a theological interpretation, based on scholarship (which, yes, I know is still grounded in opinion, but I believe in Spirit-lead revelations). Thanks so much.
Answer:
Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land which the Lord your God gives you. (Ex 20:12; Deut 5:16)
This commandment requires children to have honor, affection, and gratitude toward their father and mother.
Respect for parents (filial piety) derives from gratitude toward those who, by the gift of life, their love and their work, have brought their children into the world and enabled them to grow in stature, wisdom, and grace.
"With all your heart honor your father, and do not forget the birth pangs of your mother. Remember that through your parents you were born; what can you give back to them that equals their gift to you?" (Sir 7:27-28)
With love in Christ.
“Honor” involves the recognition of duly constituted authority. For instance, Christians are commanded, “Have honor for the king.” (1 Peter 2:17) While you may not always agree with a national ruler, still his position or office is to be respected. In the family circle, God vested parents with certain authority as his representatives. Therefore, godly children should honor that authority. But children should show more than just formal respect.
The original Greek verb rendered as “honor” in the Bible basically means to consider someone as of great value. A parent should thus be viewed as precious, highly esteemed, and dear to you. This involves having warm, appreciative feelings for them.
What, though, if your parents set a bad example, perhaps being hot-tempered, drunkards, or immoral? Understandably, you may suffer as a result. How can you honor parents like that?
As imperfect persons, your parents may have serious problems or personality flaws. (Ecclesiastes 7:20) Yet, despite their shortcomings, God has given them a certain amount of control over your life. He still requires you to honor their authority. Remember, God said that due honor should be shown even to rulers. (Romans 13:7) This requires looking beyond their conduct and focusing on their office, or position. So rather than becoming disrespectful if you feel that a parent is misusing his authority, try to stay calm. (Compare Ecclesiastes 10:4.) Leave the matter in God’s hands, for “certainly the one that is doing wrong will receive back what he wrongly did, and there is no partiality.”—Colossians 3:25.
I agree with Paradise.
The only thing I would add is that we are to honor God above all else. This means that we should not do things that our leaders or parents tell us to do if they are against the word of God.
Get them food, drink, clothing, covering, and take them where they need to go. Of course, you also need to fear them, which includes not contridicting them, not taking their seat, or their place, or calling them by their name.
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