I've dated my boyfriend for about 2.5 years, why am I still paranoid he's not over his ex?
Question:
We have lived together for the past few years and spend every free minute with each other, but I'm still insecure. He tells me he loves me, but then it makes me wonder why he hasn't proposed yet.
I have never told anyone about this :(
Although last summer he saw her in public and I asked if he talked to her and he replied with "like what? tell her she's fat?" Because she's gained a lot of weight.
Chances are he's over her by now. You need to stop letting this get to you or ultimately you'll be the one to ruin the relationship. Bear in mind, she is an ex for a reason.
To be honest, he still isn't over her. No man is ever fully over an ex. She offered things that you cannot offer to him, but he is with you because you offer him new or better things that his ex could not deliver. There is a part of him that still misses her but that is natural, the love and relationship that he had with her will never go away. But, he has moved on and committed himself to you for the better. He obviously loves and cares for you deeply. The question you must ask yourself is there something that you miss about one of your ex's, because I think that their is. No one can ever truly give us everything that we want and desire in another person, but it seems that you two have come damn close to that. So being paranoid is natural, but remember he has been with YOU for almost 3 years, YOU are the one that he want, not his ex. Just because he hasn't proposed yet doesn't mean that he won't. Don't rush the marriage thing, because that will make him panic, just take each step one at a time, don't be too quick to jump right into marriage. My guess is that he will propose, but he will do it when he is ready.
Why are you focusing on his ex? YOU have been part of his life for the past 2.5yrs now. Obviously this guy wants to be with you. Just be happy with what you have. There's no room for jealousy in relationships as it usually ends up with going seperate ways. Don't focus on the negative but rather the future with this guy. When he's ready, he'll propose, if he wants that. Be young, be free, enjoy the time you have together...that's whats really important. Take some time and discover yourself. What you want from life, from a relationship, for a career, who and what makes you tick, etc. You'll find that by filling your life and keeping busy, you won't even think about his ex. Ex= past. You = present.
I've too dealt with the same situation as you. Its normal to be paranoid about something like this. You kow I am sick and tired feeling paranoid and I just got to the point that I dont care anymore if he cares about her. what can I do about it. I've done so much to keep the relationship going but if he wants to think about her so be it and lets call off the relationship.
geeesh, youve got issues. i dont see why people think they can tell their boyfriends/girlfriends who they can talk to and who they cant. what happens when your parents told you that you couldnt do something? you went right out and did it, huh? most people know right from wrong and have morals and most of the time use them. Relationships are based on trust. think of all the wasted time spent on being jealous. my kids dont get to talk to my ex just because his new B***h, because she is jealous of me. I was fine with her until this ultimatum was given, I was the one who had to explain it to my kids. Have a nice day.
man are all you chicks that insecure in your relationships? he's been with you 2.5 yrs. i'm pretty sure you got nothing to worry about. i'll give you 2 reasons. 1.it's been 2.5 yrs. if he had feelings for her still, you would be history by now. 2. it took me all of about 7.5 seconds to get over my ex. jeez, i swear my gf is nuts too. lol i bet your safe. i could give you a list of things to try so you will be secure that he forgets other women, but i don't wanna get a hundred violations so just use your imagination ;)
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